11.20.11: The Devil Wears Prada x Whitechapel x Enter Shikari x uh..some band I missed


Keep your “no cred” comments to yourselves, heathens. Not every show can be as tr00 or as kvlt as the ones you all attend. On Sunday, I was invited to see this super Deathcore show at Club Nokia featuring the likes of TDWP, Whitechapel, Enter Shikari and some band that I missed, and I was more than happy to be in attendance. Who knows what kind of disaster I’d miss if I don’t attend shows?

Enter Shikari was already near the end of their set when I made my way into the venue. I somehow got Masakari and Enter Shikari mixed up when I told my friend, “Enter Shikari is pretty cool!” on the drive over. Once inside, the mix of dubstep and deathcore coming from the stage was completely atrocious. It was Enter Shikari. They were sucking. “I thought you said they were good!” Clearly, I had some explaining to do. “Uh, yeah, totally different band from the one I mentioned earlier. That one is actually good. These guys are trash.” I had the unpopular opinion. Enter Shikari had plenty of supporters in attendance, including the only guy in there that appeared to be older than me (more on that to come), who was shouting their lyrics at the top of his lungs, carrying a poster of the band… Okaaaay.

Once that bullshit was over, I had an opportunity to grab a few brews and scope the crowd while Whitechapel was setting up. The mix of Carnifex, STYG, IWABO etc. tees let me know what kind of crowd was in attendance — children. Also, there were several parents running around keeping their kids in check. It made me feel old for a second, but then I realized I was the only person there enjoying alcohol legally, so fuck it. I did feel bad for the bartender I talked to, though. He complained about the lack of tips, which didn’t get him any sympathy from me. One dollar per serving is all he got. Anyway!

Whitechapel took the stage while the young moshers were doing leg stretches before jumping into their arm swinging, roundhouse kicking retard pits. I don’t mind Whitechapel. In fact, I don’t really have anything negative to say about them except that all their songs sounded the same. I gotta give it up to their vocalist. Though completely unable to understand, he was fun to watch, kinda like Bannon, Davy, and Perry etc. At one point in their set, I got lost in an imaginary place that resembled the outerworld in Mortal Kombat, while DIO’s “Fever Dreams” played on a constant loop, but I was snapped out of it when Chino Moreno came out to perform guest vocals on the song “Reprogrammed to Hate.” That was definitely a moment that would have been appreciated by an older audience because these kids had no idea who the fuck he was. =( Whitechapel wrapped up just as soon as I finished my final beer of the night. Ultimate sad face.

We were told the balcony was open to everyone, so my sassy companions (yes, plural) and I wandered up there to see The Devil Wears Prada while the young’ns got all sweaty on ground level. What can I say about them except that they aren’t my thing? From what I know, these guys are massive and they had the stage setup to prove it. Never have I seen a band at Club Nokia with such an elaborate distraction from the music they played. Picture below:

You can see ramps and elevated platforms in that shit. I suppose a sexy visual helps when all your music sounds the same. I don’t remember much about their set except for coming to terms with their suckage, the lead singer claiming to love Jesus Christ and me damn near falling over a bunch of 14 year olds when I lost my footing and bruised the fuck out of my knee. Thanks to good company, though, I managed to have a fun time at the show and Whitechapel weren’t bad. Plus, I got a nice buzz from the overpriced beer that converted me from a Negative Nancy to a Chatty Clarence.

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